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Confronting the green-eyed monster
4/5/2008 - Hilary Drummond and Anita Bakker, Southern Exposure Weekend

Have you ever been in the situation where you felt threatened by someone else’s looks or talents? 

 

Do you ever compare yourself to others and come up feeling “less than”?

 

Caitlin was an accomplished woman who enjoyed the company of others.  She worked with a young woman who was not only talented but very beautiful.  Caitlin tried to avoid this woman because in her company she continually felt that she didn’t measure up.  It was becoming increasingly difficult to manage this relationship so she confided in a close friend to deal with the “Green Eyed Monster” and all the feelings that went along with it.  The friend asked her if she had ever admired a piece of art. “ Of course she had” she responded!  “Well would you  feel inadequate when in the presence of that piece of art and so avoid looking at it?”  “Of course not”, she responded, she didn’t ever compare herself to a piece of art.  “Well what would happen if you behaved the same way in the presence of this beautiful young woman.  What would happen if you enjoyed her beauty and didn’t compare yourself to her gifts.  Could you then be in her presence and not feel inadequate?” asked the friend.  Caitlin thought long and hard about this and realized that by avoiding this young woman she was depriving herself of being in the presence of beauty.  She came to enjoy this young woman and soon knew her for more than just her physical presence.

 

Have you ever felt jealous because of someone else’s talents, looks or contributions?  Have you tried to avoid them because of feelings of inadequacy when you compared your own abilities to their strengths?

 

What would happen if you stopped comparing yourself?  We all have strengths and unique contributions. Know what yours are so you can acknowledge and enjoy them, allowing yourself to freely enjoy the unique qualities of others as well!

What would the world be like if we could rejoice in the abilities of each other without feeing threatened and less than the other?

 

What is the lesson in this for you?  Share them with us at the addresses below.



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